This past week I was out of town training some new staff at our satellite location. Most of my time out there was spent training but on the last day of my trip, I attended an open house for a company that we do work with. This company happens to employee this guy who, well, hmmm...let's start from the beginning...
I met this guy when he worked for another company that I do work with. He was in charge of a project that they were using our services for. Because of some bad scheduling on their end, they started this project without really knowing what they were doing or what they needed. And this guy was relatively new at the job so he needed help. Because of this, I spent a lot of time on the phone with him. Most of it was totally professional but it got to the point where he was calling me at home or on the weekends to help sort stuff out at the last minute. As lame this sounds, because I realize we had a totally professional relationship, I almost missed talking ot him when their project finally got organized and we were no longer talking all the time. Anyways, at that point I had only met him once in person for a very brief period of time. He was my age, cute and, as I learned in all of our conversations, funny and seemed like a cool guy. So I might have developed a little innocent crush on him. The kind that you have a guy you know nothing will ever have anything with, but you still can't help but be attracted to him. Shortly after this project was completed, he left the company and went to work for a different company that we do work with as well. Since then, I have talked to him once or twice but just for quick work-related things.
Anywho, he worked for the company that was having the open house. And I was (maybe) a little excited to see him again and try to find out if he was maybe single, because he always seemed kind of available, but it never came up and I had no idea. But you know, I am always trying to keep my eyes open because I am sick of being single. So I go and I'm talking to some other people and finally make my way to where he is and we start talking and having a good time, talking about college and living in Reno and moving back there (home to him) and this and that and, auuuugggg, he was so cute and such a cool guy. A few other people join the conversation and it somehow gets around to someone else's trip to Mexico in April. The he says he is going to Mexico in 2009 but doesn't seem too excited about it so I probe for details (because, if you all haven't figured this one out yet, I don't understand people who don't like to travel). Then he says "Well, it's for my wife's friend's wedding." FUCK FUCK FUCK! He wasn't even wearing a ring! Another one? Seriously? You've got to be kidding me?!?!?!
So I left for home feeling totally dejected. It honestly had nothing to do with this guy specifically because I barely knew him, it just has to do with the fact that every guy I know that is around my age, cute, funny, attractive and seems like he might be a possibility is fucking married or engaged. It left me feeling like I totally missed the boat. In college I has some fun, but honestly got totally wrapped up in school and now I feel like I may have missed my chance for finding someone. In reality, I know this is totally (well, maybe not) absurd because I am sure there are a ton of great guys out there, but how can I not feel totally left in the dust when every guy that I start to notice is taken? If nothing else, if they are married, can we maybe pass a law that causes all married men to get a stamp on their forehead's that says so. This way, right from the start, I will know they are off the market.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Missing the boat.
The Soundtrack of your life...
This morning I was out walking my dog and I was listening to my Ipod. I thought I would do a list for my post tonight of 5 random songs on my Ipod, and why they are there. I have tons of songs that are on there because I bought the whole CD, but I have those random songs that I choose to download for whatever reason. So here we go...the 5 random songs from my Ipod and why I have them:
"Un-Break My Heart" by Toni Braxton - I have always loved this song. One night I was just hanging out at home and it popped into my head, it was just one of those songs that I HAD to download.
"Take Me There" by Raschal Flatts - I like Raschal Flatts but just downloaded this song the second I heard it, I think it is such a good 'falling in love' song.
"At Last" by Etta James - Again, a great romantic song. For a single chick, I sure have a lot of sappy ass music.
"Red High Heels" by Kellie Pickler - Can there be a better single girl song?
"Into the Night" by Santana (featuring )Chad Kroger - This is an amazing song, by an amazing artist. I could listen to this song over and over again.
So tell me, what are 5 songs from your Ipod and why are they in your list? Do they hold a memory, do you just think they are great songs, did you get a free download and have never listened to the song (I have a few of these!)?
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Going out of town.
So I am, yet again, going out of town. I will try to blog while I am away, but I wouldn't expect too much from until Saturday.
Life in Six Words or Less
I came across this meme (thanks to the trusty "More From BlogHer" sidebar that has introduced me to more blogs than I can count...or possibly read) on the blog titled A Wealth of Semi-Useless Information. I love the title!
Anywho...
Life in six words or less…
Here’s how this one works:
1. Write your own six-word memoir.
2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.
3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
4. Tag five more blogs with links.
5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play. (This last step is optional.)
So here’s my life in six words or less:
Shit this is hard...no, that's not it, although it could be...this is really hard to come up with a memoir that is six words or less...
So I started writing this blog at about noon today...it is now 9:30pm. And I just got done with a cooking class. A CREPES cooking class (this loosely translates into "A 'food of the god's' cooking class"). I LOVE crepes! In light of my recent culinary experience, I have finally decided what my memoir is going to say....
Great Food, Great Friends, Great Life.
I am so cheesy (and strung out on crepes!).
As a side note, I am watching American Idol wrap up and I want to shove David Archuleta off a cliff, I hate him!
If you read this post, you are officially tagged. I am so lazy.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Community Supported Agriculture
Most of my life I have had home-grown produce of some sort or another gracing my dinner table. My parents have always had a garden in the backyard (that grew as much as I did over the years, from a small plot in the sunny corner to a small farm that takes up almost half of their backyard). A few years back, my sister finally decided what she was going to do with her life. She discovered her passion for food and for supporting local agricultural efforts. Her love for organic agriculture and her passion for helping the people that provide these products took over her life. In turn, this meant that on every trip home, in addition to an entire carload of dirty laundry, she also brings boxes and baskets of great, homegrown, organic produce. Between my parent's home garden and my sister's bi-annual produce deliveries I have made a conscious effort to buy as much organic and locally grown produce and products as my meager budget can afford. Thanks to my sister I've been aware of CSA, Community Supported Agriculture, programs for many years but just recently learned that the Reno-Sparks-Tahoe area has a CSA program.
For those of you not familiar, CSA consists of a group of individuals who pledge support to a farm’s operation. In doing so, the growers and consumers provide mutual support and sharing of the risks and benefits of food production. Members of the group, through the purchase of membership fee's of some sort, help cover in advance the costs the farmer will incure throughout the season and, in turn, will share in the harvest throughout the growing season. A downside is that you also share in the risks of farming and, on occasion, may be affected by reduced harvests due to disease or bad weather, but in general you will be graced every week with a box brimming with fresh produce. By providing the money directly to the farmers, the farmers receive better prices for their crops, gain financial security (ensuring you will have great produce next year!) and have to worry less about marketing and distributing their products.
Most CSA programs work by forming relationships with local producers and farmers to provide a relatively consistent supply of seasonal produce. Many also provide, on demand or special order, special products such as: honey, cheeses, meats and herbs. The variety of produce that you get varies from region to region, and season to season. You have little to no say to what you actually get in most CSA programs, but you are ensured to receive fresh, generally organic, locally grown produce. Most CSA programs provide you with a plethora of recipes on how to convert those formerly unknown veggies into a steamy, yummy meal. A downfall of the CSA programs is that tropical fruits and veggies are not available, so don't expect any banana's or pineapples in your box...that is unless you live in Hawaii!
For more information I found a few websites to help you on your way to supporting your local farmers and providing yourself with tons of fresh veggies!
In the Reno-Sparks area, the local CSA program if offered by Great Basin Community Food Co-Op and runs from June to October.
Depending on location, your local CSA may run year-round.
For information about a CSA program in your area, you can visit the following websites:
Local Harvest
Land Stewardship Project
Green People
When did Wal-Mart get their family values?
This weekend I helped plan and attend a bachelorette party for a girl I work with. Part of the gift was a gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond, however we needed to add a little spice to it so we were going to stuff the bag the gift card was in with slutty, trashy g-string underwear. I went to Wal-mart to buy a plethora of slutty underwear (you know...the highly classy kind - 3 for $2.99) only to discover that APPARENTLY since the last time I really shopped at Wal-Mart (a whole 'nother story, but I hate Wal-Mart because (a)the second you walk through the doors of the store, you apparently leave your brain/manners in a basket at the door and (b) they are a horrible, horrible corporation that is causing the ultimate downfall of American society...but like I said, another story)...where was I??? Oh yes, since the last time I shopped at Wal-Mart, they have apparently stopped selling slutty underwear. I have some pretty trashy, slutty g-stings that I picked up for like $1.00 at Wal-Mart years ago. Now they only sell granny panties, cotton briefs and boy shorts, and a few thongs here and there, but not the ones that will cause a stir at a bachelorette party. Geesh, one more reason for me to hate Wal-Mart. That's what I get for being unfaithful to my long-term partner, Target. Ahhh, I love Target. Or at least I have since Shopko closed it's doors. For those of you not from the Reno-Sparks area, you will not understand my love affair with Shopko, but it was a store similar to Target, but so much better in my opinion. Anywho, I am done. Wal-Mart sucks for 3 reasons now: (1) everyone that works there/shops there is a raving idiot, or at least they are while they are in the store, (2) they are a horrible horrible company that is destroying independent business and supporting the importation of sub-par products and, essentially, indentured servitude at their foreign plants AND (3) they no longer sell slutty, cheap underwear. How are all the Gretchen Wilson listening red-neck girls gonna impress their cowboys if they can't buy slutty lingerie at Wal-Mart?
Was that random enough for ya'll?
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
The Mall
I hung out at the mall on Sunday. Not really by choice, more by necessity. Our local mall has a Sear's and part of that is they have a Sear's auto center. And my car needed new tires, so I dropped it off and they told me it would be 2-2 1/2 hours. F.U.N. So I went to the mall to return some items. Bad idea. I avoid the mall like the Black Plague! On the rare occasions I actually go to the mall, it's a quick in and out just to get my business done. I haven't "hung out" at the mall since I was in middle school. When I was in middle school, the mall was only about 4 blocks away. This meant, that as conniving teen agers, me and my friends somehow convinced our parents to let us walk to and hang out at the mall after school for a few hours. Apparently this is still the cool thing to do for teenagers. And on Sundays it is also, apparently, the most popular family bonding event. It was OVERRUN with families with screaming children, snotty teenagers and obligatory PDA couples. You all know I am single. Most days I still want children. After leaving the mall on Sunday I had myself fully convinced I NEVER wanted to have a child, that's how bad it was. Sooooo...instead of spending money I didn't have, or dealing with the screaming mass of people in the mall, I hibernated in the Borders Express. The quiet solitude of the bookstore. Ahhhhhh, it was like putting in ear plugs the second I walked through those florescent-lit doors. No more screaming children, no more snotty teenagers, just the crazy old man sitting in the corner whispering to himself. After perusing the bargain books, I found a quite little bench in the cooking section and planted myself for the next 2 hours. I looked at about a zillion cookbooks and then proceeded to buy "The Omnivore's Dilemma" and "In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto" by Michael Pollan because I couldn't justify buying ANOTHER cookbook! I might have also bought a bargain version of a karma sutra book...because remember, I have no money! And it's not like I am getting any action, but at least when I finally do, I'll know what I am doing (or...well..at least the bargain bin moves!). But, the point of this entire story is: HOW COOL AM I? I hang out the mall all afternoon and where was I, not in the food court, not looking at expensive shoes, but hibernating in the book store. I am such a dork!
Another brief highlight from my trip to the mall. I had to return some bra's at Lane Bryant. As I was walking through the store, right past a set of dressing rooms, I hear the following conversation between husband and wife:
Husband (from outside the dressing room): "As long as it's not blue or green"
Wife (from inside the dressing room): "WHAT?"
Husband: "Huh, what. I didn't say anything."
Such a brief glimpse into the glory that is the male-female relationship but it was hilarious to hear the husband totally talking shit behind his wife's back, and denying every bit of it to her face.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
The call
So be called earlier today. I actually didn't even hear my phone ring so I haven't actually talked to him, but he was just calling to "see how I was doing today" and said to give him a call whenever.
Should I call back? He seemed like a nice enough guy until the other night, now I'm not so sure...
Maybe Mother Nature Knew Better Than Me...
I did call the guy. And I did have a date this weekend. Or, well, was supposed to have a date this weekend. But Mother Nature had other plans in mind. I was supposed to meet him for drinks in South Lake Tahoe (where he lives, about 45 minutes from Reno where I live). For those not familiar with this area, Reno is in a valley, you have to drive over the Sierra Nevada Mountains to get to South Lake Tahoe. Too bad it decided to snow on Friday night, I actually got about half way there but the road were really bad, icy and snowy and blah, so I called to cancel. We were maybe going to do something on Sat. but it was even snowier last night. So I told him to call me next weekend. But here's the thing, I'm not so sure I want him too after my brief look into his personality the other night.
I called him on Thursday and we made plans to have drinks. I offered to drive to South Lake because I wanted the out option (the option to get out of the date if it wasn't going well by saying I had to get going because I had a long drive ahead). However, enter exhibit #1, he didn't even offer to drive to Reno, or meet me halfway. Strange, but I wasn't too concerned at this point because like I said, I wanted the out option. So the plan was to meet at 8 at a bar in SLT. At about 7:15 I was headed that way and it starting snowing, hard. It wasn't sticking to the roads but I wasn't even in the mountains yet. So I called to cancel/see if he wanted to meet me half way. He tried to convince me to come up there and I said I didn't want to drive in the mountains with the weather like that because I didn't have 4-wheel drive and didn't want to get stuck in SLT. We talked for a few minutes, I was still headed in his direction because there was no where to turn around on the road I was on. Enter Exhibit #2...I tried to convince him to meet me half way and he was VERY resistant to meeting me half way. And he kept just saying "I mean, if you get stuck up here you can stay here, it's not like you don't have a place to stay." Now, Enter Exhibit #3...I was totally thrown off by the fact that he was completely ok making me drive threw shitty weather to see him, but he wasn't going to do the same to see me. Men...this is not ok, by any standards! By this time it had stopped snowing and he said it wasn't snowing up there so I changed my mind and headed up there. I figured he might be nervous or something, and it's been forever since I've been on a date so I wanted it to happen. Then...It started snowing again, but not that badly. So I headed up into the mountains and the roads got bad, very quickly. They got icy, and snowy. And I decided I really didn't want to (a) get in an accident on my way there (b) get stuck up there with a guy that I barely knew and (c) possibly get stuck up there all weekend, if the weather got really bad. So I called and canceled. Then he got kind of weird. He kept trying to convince me to come up there, even though I was obviously not comfortable driving with the roads all shitty. And he kept just trying to convince me by saying I had somewhere to stay if I did get stuck up there. And seriously, even if he was totally just a one night stand, I still wouldn't want to get stuck with him overnight, or all weekend! So I turned around and told him to call me tomorrow (Sat.) if it was nicer out or next weekend and we would try to hang out. But then, enter exhibit #4, he said "yeah, you can come up here next Friday or something." Which wouldn't have been that big of a deal, except I just spent 1 1/2 hours driving half way there, to not even see him, and he was still going to expect me to drive up there again next weekend.
So there's my "almost" date story...maybe Mother Nature knew better than me and was just trying to show me he wasn't worth my time...or should I give him another chance...but either way, at least it's a step in the right direction!
Friday, March 14, 2008
You guys all suck...
I can't believe only 3 people have voted on my blog poll. 3 people in like 7 hours! I KNOW more people have read my blog since 8am than 3 people. Geesh, what kind of readers do I have? THE KIND WHO LURK IN THE DARK CORNERS OF CYBERSPACE READING MY INSPIRING MEMORABLE NOTEWORTHY WORDS, THAT'S THE KIND! GEESH!
And you all obviously don't know me well enough, I can't believe all 3 of you who HAVE voted think I called the guy. Really, are you sure about that? I am kind of a chicken shit when it comes to this whole dating thing. I mean it's been like a zillion years since I've actually been on a date, why would you think that all the sudden I would throw caution to the wind and call some strange guy I barely know. What is wrong with you guys? You obviously have way more confidence in my dating skills than I do. That's not to say that I did or didn't call him...I'm not revealing that information quite yet.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Winds of Change
So my alternative title for this post was "Ginger might finally get some action in the near future" but, well, I went with the more mature title (not sure why, it's like I'm that mature, I mean I just got finished having a conversation with my co-workers that involved the works 'jello-like', 'poo', and 'soft serve'...you connect the dots!).
With the exception of Dog Park guy, it's been a very long time since I've had guys flirt with me on a regular basis, let alone actually be hit on. I'm not exactly sure why. Maybe I haven't been putting out the 'I'm single and want to get laid fall in love' vibe enough, or maybe there is suddenly a plethora of single men that I, for some reason or another, have come in contact with. All I know is that, over the past couple of weeks, I've had more guys flirt with me, hit on my or just look in my general direction (is it now obvious how desperate I am when a guy simply looking in my direction is exciting?). And let me make it clear that by 'plethora' I mean 3 guys. But in a month, that's not bad, it's sure as hell better than the past few months years.
First there was this guy, I actually never caught his name, it might have been Andrew, but we flirted over Scottish trivia and scotch at a Scotch tasting event that I went to while I was in Salt Lake City for work. He was a little older, but cute, and funny and it made my evening talking with him. Nothing ever came of it, and I'm pretty sure he lives in Virginia so I will probably never see him again, but none the less, it reminded me how much I love flirting.
The second guy was just some guy that I happen to lock eyes with at Trader Joe's the other night. We never even talked, but catching the glismp of a cute guy, who you know has, at least, a decent taste in grocery stores, can be quite a rush on an otherwise mundane evening.
Yesterday I was at a trade show up in South Lake Tahoe. It was held at a casino, as are every other major event in this area because they have convention centers, food and lodging in one location. At some point in the day, I was walking back through the casino to go to my car and grab some more free shit to give away and I walked by this booth where they were trying to sell time-share things, or something similar to that. I barely even noticed the guy until he said "How are doing today Ginger?" It totally threw me off that he knew my name, I double backed to see if I knew him, and then I realized I was wearing a giant name tag. At that point he was either (a) still trying to sell me something or (b) trying to flirt with me but not doing a very good job of it. I, on the other hand, was just trying to get away before I got sucked into a 4 hour talk about the benefits of owning a timeshare. Plus I had to work. So...I ever so slightly blew this guy off, acting ever so slightly like a bitch, and extracted myself from the situation. The only problem being that I had to walk right by this guy again to get back to the tradeshow. I mean, unless I wanted to walk down 3 flights of stairs in the parking garage, shlep myself across a parking lot then take an elevator up 3 floors and, well, you get the point. Since I was wearing high heels, I figured this guy would probably leave me alone since, as I said before, I might have acted slightly bitchy to get out of him trying to sell me something. Not really bitchy, just a little "I have better things to do" bitchy. So I walked by him again, he saw me coming from a million miles away. This time he just said "Hi Ginger...I'm Jeff by the way." Trying to redeem myself from my former bitchy state, I said hi back. Then he asked me where I was from and the second I said Reno, it was all over. "Really? So, are you just down here for work? For how long? Do you come to Tahoe a lot?" and on and on and on... then came the big questions "Do you mind me asking you, are you single?" I am such a bad liar. So I just said yes, even though I still wasn't sure he was trying to hit on me, or sell me something. After I said yes, I was indeed single, he asked for my phone number. Instead I told him he should give me his.
Now I have his card, with his cell phone on it, just staring at me. Taunting me. I'm still not entirely sure about him. He seemed nice enough, maybe a little dorky, and he does sell timeshares for a living, which is not all that appealing, but like I said, he seemed nice enough and wasn't bad looking. Do I call? Do I not call? My reasoning is, at this point, I really could care less about him, and I need some practice dating, so if nothing else, even if he ends up thinking I am some crazy weird girl, at least I will get some dating pratice. How's that for a run-on sentence with WAY too many comma's?
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Speaking of "The Rules"...
Misguided Mommy has begun to share the utter dorkiness that was our friendship when we were younger in some of her guest posts, however she hasn't even begun to scratch the surface. As proof of this, I have unburied some of my old photo albums and scrapbooks and now have proof of the dork's that we were.
Friday, March 7, 2008
A few remaning drops...
First of all, my readers all rock. You guys are all great people and I am lucky to have you in my life (even if it is only through this blog!). I got a few more questions after the fact that I wanted to answer as well.
So here we go...
Misguided Mommy asked me "what is the thing hiding in your house that reminds you of a guy and something or other from one of your vacations?" A while back I had written this post about having something in my kitchen that reminded me of my dirty little secret. This, I am sorry to say, I will not tell you about. I treasure this stupid memento for what it stands for and I am not going to share with you what it is, that would take the fun out of leaving it up in plain view all of the time. I know, you AB. SO. LUTE. LY HATE ME RIGHT NOW! Too bad, so sad, on to the next question...
Babba Unknown asked "Anywho... I do have a question....... why did you originally start writing this blog. Was it out of boredom or did you have something that you needed to get out???? Also looking back has your blog turned out the way you intended?" I honestly have no idea why I started a blog. Misguided Mommy had one, and I enjoyed reading it and I saw that it gave her a forum to talk about anything she wanted, and here and there she would get some feedback about problems in her life, so I thought it couldn't be all bad. I figured if I didn't get into it, I probably wouldn't have any readers (except her) so if I decided to stop blogging it wouldn't be a big deal. Also, I has tossed around the idea of writing a fiction book and figured that this might be a way for me to try my hand out at writing and see if I was any good at it. I now realize that writing a blog is nothing like writing a novel would be, but it has still showed me that I actually really do enjoy writing (although who knows if I am any good at it) and that, maybe, my far-fetched idea of writing a book isn't THAT far-fetched. When I started writing I had no expectations of what my blog is, or should be, so I can't say that it has or hasn't turned out the way I expected. That's the problem with expectations, if you don't have them you can never realized that you never met them! Most of the people in my real life don't realize I have a blog, and only a few that know I have it, actually read it. I have written a few posts that have pissed off some of my real life friends. I don't regret them. They have caused me and those people to come to a much more honest place than we were before, even though there were some hard times in there as well. I haven't told most of my family I write this blog, not for fear that they will read it, but because I want a place that is outside the realm of my family. If that makes any sense?!? Now I think I am just rambling so hopefully that answered your question because I am going to stop myself before I lose you guys!
Ok, I think I answered them all. If I missed any, please let me know and I will try to answer them.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Pouring my heart out...
To celebrate my blog being 1 year old, I gave my loyal readers the opportunity to ask me whatever they wanted and I would answer as honestly as I could bring myself to answer! So here we go...
I'm starting with Patty's question because it is the most fun to answer and the easiest. Patty asked "What are the top 3 places in the world you still want to visit?" Admittedly I thought this question would be the easier thing to answer but it's not, because I want to go so many places! If I had to choose, I would pick Belize (to go kayaking and diving in the Blue Hole), Costa Rica (because something has always drawn me to this place, plus I've heard it's an amazing place to visit) and back to Australia (but instead of traveling the East coast like I did before, I was to visit places like Ayer's Rock, Darwin, Perth and Western Australia).
Misguided Mommy asked me these questions (but only to make herself seem like she really cares about the answers when all she really wants me to answer is the REAL question she asked me via email...in case I didn't want to answer it...). Here are her easy questions first "would you rather give up alcohol or sweets if you were forced? And none of this, i don't have to make this choice so I wont answer, you have to answer. Your stranded on an island. You are supplied with all the food, water and necessities to thrive. You can bring 3 things that do not plug in what are they?" She knows me too well, normally when asked questions like this I always answer with "I don't know, I don't have to choose so why should I?" but I said I would answer anything so here we go. I would most definitely give up alcohol over sweets. I really do not drink that often (although I may drink to get drunk when I drink, I mean, why consume the calories without the freedom and craziness that comes with being drunk!). Also, if I gave up sweets I would lose the group of food products that I absolutely ROCK at cooking/baking. And you can't cook if you don't taste your products, right? Next, The 3 items that do not plug in, I would take to a stranded island, if I were given food, water and necessities to survive, I would take with me: "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. I just recently finished reading this book but it is an amazing book, it combines everything from a modern day fairy tale to a spiritual guide for the modern woman into one book. It has the ability to make you think, and to take you to far away places, which is exactly the kind of book you want to be reading if you are stranded on an island. I would also take with me snorkel gear because I enjoying looking at the fish and it might also come in handy if I need to catch fish, and a kayak. A kayak might not get me off the island (as if I would want to leave a deserted island) but it would give me something to do, and also a mode of transportation around the island.
Sara (hi there by the way, I don't think we've met before) asked me "Tell us about your favorite sexual encounter." My good friend Dyan asked "Ok... I have a question for you.... in all your traveling escapades.... have you ever had a secret foreign lover? Something I always wondered and never heard you say.... indulge me ~" I plan to answer both of these in one question so here we go...I have 2 very different favorite sexual encounters. The first one is the first time I slept with my fuck buddy. At the time, we were still kind-of, sort-of maybe trying to date. We were 18 and freshmen in college and both very inexperienced in the sack. We were SOOOO nervous. He had invited me over 'to study' (to his credit, we did have a class together, but I think we both knew there was no studying that was going to happen). I got to his house (that he shared with like 4 other guys, all older than us and, well, they were typical college guys...they had a poster in their living room demonstrating how to put a condom on. A handmade poster. Need I say more?). The one thing I have always loved about FB is that no matter how casual our relationship has gotten, he really is a great guy at heart. He acts like a bad ass around his buddies but he really is just a nice guy with a kind heart. This never showed more than this night. We 'studied' for a while, mostly just turned pages in our books and pretending that we were studying. We eventually started kissing and one thing led to another and the moment I will remember for the rest of my life is that right before we did the deed, he was holding his body above mine and he was shaking, just a little but, because he was so nervous. It was THE MOST ADORABLE THING I have ever seen. That is my first favorite sexual encounter. My second will answer both Sara's and Dyan's question. And sadly this one doesn't end in me actually getting any action, but it's a good story none-the-less. When I was traveling around Australia, about half way through my trip I found myself staying at a hostel in Caines. From there I took a weekend trip to some hostel in the Daintree rainforest. I had expected it to be all warm and sunny but it ended up raining and being cold most of the time I was at this hostel, and I only had a small weekend bag with me so I pretty much had nothing to do. Neither did anyone else there. The first night at dinner there was a group of people eating. A girl I had been talking with earlier was there, along with these 2 guys and this other girl. Since I was by myself I asked if I could join them. Turns out the 2 guys were friends and traveling together (from Canada) and the other girl was from Canada as well, but not with the guys. Me and one of the guys hit it off and started drinking. Did I mention at the time I was drinking A LOT and could keep up with a 200 lb guy from Canada (we drank a lot, I lost track after about an hour and about 10 pints of beer...). The other's hung out with us for a while but around 1 am (when the 'bar' closed) but we somehow convinced the 'bartender' to keep giving us beers, since she couldn't sell them to us anymore. I use the term 'bar' loosely by the way. Around 4 am (and half the supply of beer in all of Australia later) we finally decided to call it a night. Nothing happened that night, I just stumbled up the stairs to my cabin and passed out (luckily I made it to my bed first...I think). The next night pretty much the same thing happened. Again, ending with me stumbling back to my bed alone. I left the next morning to go back to the hostel in Caines and truthfully regretted not getting some drunken rainforest action. I got back to Caines and spent the next day relaxing and recovering from my 2 nights of severe drinking. The next day I had left to do something fun and when I got back that evening, I ran into my drinking partner in the lobby. Turns out they had decided to come to Caines a few days early because of something to do with his buddy (I didn't really get along that well with his buddy so I didn't pay much attention to him...). I should explain, these guys were a little older (he was 37 and his friend was about the same) but they loved traveling. My drinking partner had gotten recently divorced and had come with his buddy for the hell of it, but they tended to do their own thing a lot so I ended up hanging out with him quite a bit without his friend. That night we all went to dinner at a bar in town. After dinner his buddy left and it was me, my DB (drinking buddy) and the other Canadian girl. I should also explain that the other Canadian girl was a bitch. An annoying, weird looking giant of a girl (she was like 6 feet tall and wasn't skinny, although not really fat, just a little heavy) who thought that she was god's gift to the planet and was so much smarter than everyone else just because she was (a) Canadian and (b) doing medical research or some shit like that. She annoyed the fuck out of me. Plus she liked my DB because she annoyingly followed them to Caines. Ohhh, she pissed me off. Which just meant that I wanted to piss her off. Which means I let my DB buy all my drinks when he offered, and not to her, and I let her buy my drinks because she stupidly try to buy DB drinks and then he would order a round for all 3 of us and she wasn't rude enough to say she wouldn't pay for the round. It also meant that every chance I got, I put my hands all over DB and sat next to him any chance I got. So there were all 3 of us, drinking and hanging out and dancing. We were all hanging out by the dance floor and pool tables when DB left to get me and him another round of beers. While we were standing there, these guys playing pool came up to me and one of them said "hey, it's my buddies birthday, will you give him a kiss." And right then DB came back and I said, "Nope, sorry I can't" and then I leaned into DB's side and said "that guy right there was trying to convince me to kiss him because it was his birthday" in a (drunk) attempt to get him to kiss me. He responded "it's starting to look more and more like my birthday..." and then we kissed. With the other stupid Canadian girl standing right there. And we kept kissing...and kept kissing...and kept kissing...get the drift yet? No, ok, well we kept on kissing for a very long time. Finally she interrupted us to say she was going to take off. At that point we just wanted to do more than kiss so we said we would walk back with her. She tried so hard to not to have to walk back with us but at that point I was being a total bitch to her and he just wanted to get laid so we all walked back together, stopping at the store to buy some more beer and some snacks. We held hands and were all touchy touchy the whole way back. It was like a 10 minute walk. We got back to the hostel and all sat down in the courtyard area. DB had me put my feet in his lap and was stroking my legs and the Canadian chick had had enough so she went to bed. We sat there and talked for a while, not entirely sure how to get back to the intense kissing we had at the bar, and not entirely sure were to go to have sex. We were both staying in shared rooms so we each had like 4 other people in our rooms, and no matter how drunk I am, I cannot have sex in front of that many strangers, especially if it means waking them up from a dead sleep. In our drunken horny haze we decided the men's bathroom would do. Did I mention how drunk we were and how horny we were? In retrospect, there were much more suitable places but it was the closest and we were VERY DRUNK AND VERY HORNY. So we 'snuck' into the bathroom, went in the shower stall and stared making out and getting undressed. Then someone came in the bathroom. We froze, hoping it was just some late night guy going piss. Nope, it was the damn night manager for the hostel. All I remember him saying is "Is there a female in here" and us trying to hide my flip flops and DB trying to lie and say he was just taking a shower. All the while trying to get my clothes back on. We eventually had to give it up and admit we were in there, he took our names and sent us to our rooms. So even though I never actually got any sex, this is a great memory because it was hilarious and also I was proud of going after the guy I wanted like I did. Plus, like I said, I hated that stupid Canadian girl and I totally stole the guy from her.
Whew...ready for a break yet. I am, I'll be back soon...
I left the question asked by Misguided Mommy until the end because it was the hardest question for me to answer. I actually cried a little bit when I first read this email because I know it came from a place of love and caring.
Misguided Mommy said "okay, so something i've wanted to ask for a while now. Why do you really have no interest in losing weight? I no longer look at this from a vein image sort of view but from a health, heart point of view, what is the actual reason? DON'T KILL ME, IT'S JUST AFTER LEARNING THE DAMAGE I WAS DOING TO MY BODY I'M REALLY LOOKING AT EVERYONE AROUND ME SAYING HEY I WANT YOU TO BE AROUND FOR THE NEXT 50 YEARS YOU KNOW, JUST ASK ROB, HE ISN'T EVEN ALLOWED TO HAVE BACON MORE THEN LIKE ONCE A MONTH ANYMORE! I"M ALL OVER LISA ABOUT IT, AND ANGIE, AND MY MOM, AND MY DAD, AND MY KIDS, AND MY GRANDMA AND............ SERIOUSLY I'M TOTALLY HAPPY WEIGHING 160 RIGHT NOW BUT NOW, IT'S ALL ABOUT BEING HEALTHY FOR MY KIDS AND FAMILY SO PLEASE DON'T KILL ME FOR ASKING THAT. ALSO I SENT IT VIA EMAIL SO YOU CAN TOTALLY CHOOSE TO NOT POST IT IF YOU WANT! Some things I've learned lately, any thing over a 40" waist is considered a heart attack waist. The weight around your belly is the worst for you (which sucks cuz thats where i have the most) and that women are so much more susceptible to heart conditions. A size 40" waist isn't even bad I'm about a 40 now and again I think I look fine. You know I've been hinting about this for a while with the Tummy Tuck blog, I just honestly reallllly worry about your health. I'm such a moron, but I just love you. be honest let me know if i'm pissing you off!"
Shannon and I have been friends for a very long time and I know that she cares about me. In person she has never asked me about by weight, and we have had very few conversation about my weight. We talk about hers all the time. I am going to start this off my saying that I know it all. I know all of the facts about weight, about belly fat being the biggest indicator of future heart problems, I know about the good food, I know what you should eat and what you shouldn't. I am very educated about calories and nutrition and exercise and weight problems. I also know that most of the reason's I hold on to weight are emotional. While I could definitely eat better than I do, I actually eat pretty good and always have. I do eat fast food, but only 1-2 times a month. I do eat sweets, but I generally feel satisfy after 1 piece of chocolate or a few bites of cake. I eat fruits and veggies. I don't fry very many things and I use olive old and eat mostly organic products and try to avoid overly processed foods most of the time. I also don't generally overeat when I am happy, sad, depressed or any of those things. All of these things are generalizations because I do eat crap as well, I have a slightly addictive relationship with Fruit Gushers and Marshmallows, and I also enjoy soda (I limit myself to 1 a day, most days I drink about half of that soda and toss the rest) and I also enjoy foo-foo coffee drinks. Foo-Foo coffee drinks are my ultimate downfall. They are like crack for me! I am completely obsessed with them even though I am fully aware the havoc they wreak on my stomach, my waistline and my wallet! That being said, I have always been a little on the heavy side even though, as a family, we eat very well. Most of my family is. Not that that is an excuse because my sister isn't and she came from the same gene pool as me. Even when I was in the best shape of my life (on the varsity swim team, kickboxing a few days a week, going to the gym 4-5 days a week, hiking, backpacking, etc.) I was still what most would consider plus size. This was ok with me because I knew that i was in shape. I have read several articles saying that also long as you are cardiovascularly fit (could walk up x number of stairs or some shit without getting out of breath) that you are actually at no more of a risk than a skinny person of the same fitness level, even if you carry a little extra weight. This was me, I was very fit, very muscular and still a little on the heavy side. This is until I went to college. I got lazy and overwhelmed. My weight has actually changed very little since my sophomore year in college, the only difference is that my muscle is no longer muscle, it is now fat. My body has totally changed even though I essentially weigh the same (give or take 10 lbs). I mentioned that a large reason I have held onto the weight I have is emotional. There are a lot of things about my life that I am unhappy about. I am unhappy that I have a very large amount of credit card debt, that which only is getting larger and larger because I spend more every month than I make. I am unhappy that I have no idea what I want to do with my life, and that I work at a job that I am not really happy about. I like it but I know I will never like it more than I do now, and that just doesn't settle well with me. Plus I work long hours, don't get paid for anything past 40 hours, and take a lot of shit from clients and from people I work with. I am unhappy that I let myself get this out of shape, but am too tired at the end of the day to do anything about it. I am unhappy that it seems like everybody's life is moving forward and mine is stagnant. I am unhappy that I've never had a real relationship, and have no idea how to proceed to get one. I am unhappy that I feel like maybe I don't deserve a relationship, don't deserve to be loved by someone because of whatever reasons... All of this translates into why I don't want to lose weight, I deep down, don't really think I deserve it. I've always day dreamed a lot. I still do once in a while. Almost without fail, all of these start out with "when I lose some weight" or "I'm skinnier by then of course" and then some rendition of 'he likes me' of 'I finally got the dream job' or 'I finally paid off my debt.' I use my weight as the excuse why I am unhappy. Why I am single, why I am stuck in debt, why I can't figure out what I want to do with my life. Logically, I know that my weight has little to no affect on me being single, in debt or unhappy with my life, but it is the one thing I can understand, and it is the one thing I blame for all my misfortune. Losing the weight would remove my scape-goat. It would make me face those factors without 40 extra pounds masking the view. As a logical smart person, I know this is what needs to happen for me to get past my unhappiness but I haven't accepted that I deserve that yet. I am not sure where to go from here. I have made recent efforts to eat better, eat veggies more often, eating breakfast (more than just a foo-foo coffee drink) and now the next step is getting my ass exercising more often. Then you have the whole 'accepting that I deserve to be healthy and love myself and blah blah blah'. That whole thing.
So there we go, that is why I haven't made any solid attempt to lose weight. I don't think I deserve it. I now I am crying because that seems even stupider written down than it does in my head.
Now that I am done pouring my heart out about everything from my weight to some hot and heavy details, I hope I let you guys see a little bit more about myself. As always, I welcome other questions (you didn't miss your one and only chance) or comments. I also have a few more questions I haven't answered but I am done for the day, I will post the rest tomorrow.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Blogiversary in it's final hours...
So my blog is almost officially 1 year old. Ahh, I am so proud. Well, most of the time...
This is your last chance to submit questions for me to answer in tomorrow's 1 Year Blogiversary post. You can ask me anything you want and I will answer it with complete honesty...anything...here's your chance...
I quite obviously was not thinking clearning
Yesterday I posted my Top 5 favorite posts and I wrote, and I quote (myself) "Since I am still in a sort of post-flu haze and I am not thinking entirely clearning..." THAT is why I didn't try to write anything more complex than the titles to my previous posts!
What the hell is that word anyways, some sort of marriage between cleaning and clearly. Maybe I can make up a new word, from here on out, 'clearning' is officially a word.
Clearning = cleaning with clarity
Oh shit, if I make it a word, then my prior use of it makes even less sense than when it wasn't a word? Ok, this definition only applies from THIS post and forward, there is no retroactive defining of fake words. Whew, glad we got THAT cleared up!
Sleeping in your car
A few days ago I was listening to the radio and the station was having people call in to tell their best 'sleeping in their car' stories. My fondest (only in retrospect, by the way) memory of sleeping in a car took place right after I graduated high school.
In celebration of graduating high school, I decided to travel to Hawaii for a month. My sister was going to be traveling with me for the entire trip and my mom and a friend of hers where traveling with us for the first 2 weeks. This happened after my mom and her friend went home. My sister and I were on the island of Maui. We were camping at the time, moving from campsite to campsite whenever the mood struck us. For those of you not familiar with camping in Hawaii, it is generally very cheap (if not free) and I mean really, you're in Hawaii so your probably spending most of your time sleeping on the beach under a Palm tree anyways, why pay for a hotel? Every place we went was gorgeous and some of the best camping I've even been lucky enough to take part it. However, we had recently been camping up on Mount Haleakala and my sister had met this guy. Nothing happened except some friendly conversation but I didn't really like him. He was kind of weird and I was being pissy about my sister ditching me for a guy. Anywho, a few days later we were taking our home on wheels rental car out mobbing on hardened lava that our rental car company had explicitly told us not to drive on for a nice leisurely drive and we found this cool beach. We were hanging out and sure enough we ran into the weird guy that my sister had met. They were camping there and had invited us to stay there as well. I threw a hissy fit and said I wanted to camp somewhere else because I was worried that something might happen to the car and blah blah blah (when really I just didn't want to hang out with this guy).
After I threw my little hissy fit, my sister and I decided to camp somewhere else. We had seen a few campgrounds by the hotel we stayed in when my mom and her friend were still in town so we went to that area. Did I mention it was the 4th of July so all of the campsites were full except one. Ah, except that faithful creepy, horror-movie, psycho, don't-drink-the-koolaid campground. Most campgrounds in Hawaii are state or federal government owned. This place was a private campground for some religious group. THIS WAS THE WEIRDEST PLACE I'VE EVER BEEN. Most campgrounds in Hawaii are surrounded by lush, tropical forests with lots of pretty flowers and grass. This place was like the areas in Hawaii the Christians must have subject the natives to in order to make them comply with their wishes. The campground was next to the water, but the waterline was lined with these horrible nasty trees that had thorns the size of my arm sticking off of them that hurt like a fucking bastard when you inadvertently stepped on one and it poked you through your flip flop. Instead of lush, grassy areas to lay your tent down, this place has 8x8 foot piece of carpet caked in 10 years of Hawaiian dust and mud for you to put your tent down on. Instead of relatively clean sani-hits for you to pee in, this place has these creepy bathroom stalls that I am pretty sure probably had hidden camera's installed somewhere in them. And instead of any type of Hawaii flora anywhere surrounding the campground, this place has been weedwacked down to the bare ground. And on top of all of this, this place has some pretty nice cabins located directly adjacent to the campground, complete with indoor bathrooms, washing machines, dryers, a refrigerator and ice machine, phones and nice grassy areas with lawn chairs to hang out in. HOWEVER, "Those are ONLY for the people staying here with 'the church'." Did I mention that when we got there, after paying $15.00 for the night (like I said, most places in Hawaii are either free or like $5.00 a night to camp) this creepy religious weirdo had to give us a tour of everything I described above, included the entire cabin area. However, throughout the entire portion of the tour of the cabins, after every sentence he would say "Those are ONLY for the people staying here with 'the church'" I still to this day so not know what 'Church' he was referring to...
So whatever, we pay the $15.00, let the creepy little religious pervert give us a tour and then go sit in the hammock, underneath the death trees (with the giant thorns) and spend the rest of the evening at the park down the road because we are too creeped out to stay there. So we go to a BBQ at the park, watch the fireworks, almost get ourselves lite on fire by some locals who were setting off their own fireworks and then go back to the campground to sleep. The reason we almost got lite on fire was because it has gotten VERY windy late in the day. I know I've mentioned this campground has almost no vegetation. Which meant, as we were lying in our tent trying to sleep, every time a gust of wind would blow through our desert of a campground, it would catch a bunch of dirt and blow it right inside our tent. This kept happening, like every 30 seconds, for maybe 2 hours until my sister and I finally got so fed up that we went and sat in the car to try and decide what to do. You know, now that we paid $15.00 to sleep in the shittiest, creepiest campground in the world? And you know, because it was 2 am by then? We finally decide (as did about half a dozen other people who were in the same position as us) to pack up our dirt covered belongings and hit the road. We rolled up our tent, with all of our belongings inside of it, and stuffed it in the backseat of the car. We hit the road and headed back to the park we had left not long earlier. On our way there, we stopped at a Chevron to fill up on gas (so we could leave the car running with the heat on, since our blankets were covered in dust). While we were filling up, we had opened the truck to grab something and this bum comes walking over to us (he saw our cooler in the trunk) and asks for something to eat. We open in quickly and hand him an apple, hoping that will satisfy him and he will leave. We were wrong, he reaches in the trunk, opens the lid to the cooler and say, "No, I want that!" and points at some cheese we had. At this point we were totally freaked out and just handed over the cheese. Finally this tough ass night attendant chick comes out and scares away the bum, thank god because my sister and I had no idea what to do but hand over our food! So after all of this, we drive to the park and take our tent and sleeping bags out and shake them out and lay them on the grass to air out. We then take showers in their little outdoors showers (you know, the ones meant for rinsing off after you get out of the ocean) because we, as well, are covered in dust. We then get in our car and take a nap until about 6 am in our car in the parking lot of this park, with our shit spread out all over the park (in retrospect, we probably should have waited until morning to spread our stuff all over the place to avoid it possibly getting stolen while we were sleeping, but oh well, nothing happened!). After we woke up, we put some of our stuff away and proceeded to go back to sleep on our towels in the park for a few more hours. Needless to say, we rented a hotel room the next night!
Do you have a great 'sleeping in your car' story? Share it with me...
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
My Top 5
Since I am still in a sort of post-flu haze and I am not thinking entirely clearning, I thought I would recap the glory that is my own writing and make a list of my Favorite Top 5 posts (in comparison to the other 200+ posts that were probably just so-so).
5) Pro's and Con's of Living by Yourself
4) Another Life...
3) An Open Letter to the Guy I was Forced to Sit Next to at the Movies.
2) On the Edge of a Cliff...
1) A Letter to my Body
Monday, March 3, 2008
By the way, you guys all suck
So it's been like 5 days since I put up my little "it's my blogiversary, ask me anything you want" post and I have gotten 2, YES TWO, COUNT THEM...ONE...TWO QUESTIONS. You guys all suck!
You only have until Thursday since I will post my responses on Friday, my one year blogiversary, so they better start pouring in...OR ELSE...
If I fill my house with vegetables, I'll eat them, right?
This statement should be the tag line for my life. Now, don't get me wrong, I eat a fair (I had to choose that word wisely) amount of fruits & veggies every day. By no means do I eat the recommended amount and my no means am I like my sister. My sister is an aberration. She eats enough vegetables that you could probably put her in a juicer and squeeze yourself a glass or two of carrot-celery-kale-spinach-parsley juice. Ok, that was a slightly disturbing thought I realize, but it's true, I'm not entirely sure she's actually human anymore. I think she has largely morphed into some sort of human-plant hybrid because of her unimaginably large daily consumption of vegetables and fruit. I, on the other hand, probably have 2-3 servings of fruit a day and 1-2 servings of veggies. Not great, but not bad. And I eat a pretty diverse range of veggies.
Since moving out on my own, my eating habits have definitely gone downhill a little bit. Some brie, crackers and salami often passes as a meal in my home. And by 'home' I mean my 850 sq. foot condo that houses me and my dog (part-time). However, I have also started eating some veggies that I haven't ate since I learned i could say no to my parents (like mushrooms, tomatoes and olives. Although I am not sure an olive counts as a vegetable, especially since it's salted and cured...).
I diverge...The point of my story is that even though I may not eat the recommended dosage of fruits and veggies, my refrigerator and counters are always stocked full of fruits and veggies. I buy tons of them, in the hopes that if, when I open my fridge, all I see to eat are veggies that I will EAT THEM. What a concept, huh? Too bad it doesn't work most of the time. As much as I hate to admit this, I throw away a very large portion of produce I buy. I know how much of a waste it is, not only in the food itself (starving kids in Africa probably wouldn't get my extra produce in time, even if I tried to ship it to them...) but in money and my time going to the damn store. Part of this is because I will eat something for a day or two, then get bored and leave the remainder until it is discolored and slightly odor-riffic, in which case it finds it's way into my trash can during my weekly refrigerator purge. Sometimes I honestly forget that I buy stuff, so I buy it again (this happens all the time with celery, for whatever reason my brain is not developed enough to hold onto the fact that yes, indeedy-do I did buy celery on Sunday...and Wed...and well now I just bought it again on Friday. Shit! And sometimes I get home from work, look in my fridge full of veggies and decide to order a pizza instead.
So here is my problem, I obviously have no aversion to BUYING vegetables, nor do I theoretically have a problem with eating them, but I still find myself wasting tons of food because in the end, I do not eat them. Well most of them.
Saturday, March 1, 2008
The loneliest feeling...
So I have been sick since Wed. Wed. I just felt like I had a bad cough, I figured I had just been working weird hours, traveled a bunch (I was out of town for a trade show for work) and I had been out late the night before. I figured it would go away quick enough. Then Thursday came around I realized that I must have caught whatever crap flu has been going around because I was sicker than I think I have ever been, alternating between burning up because of my fever and chills, coughing (or well, hacking is more like it), I felt like I was drunk because my head was so congested and blah blah blah. Just be thankful you don't have what I had (or hope you don't get it!).
Since Thursday I have spent about 90% of my time either in front of my TV sleeping, or in my bed sleeping. How's that for an exciting weekend? It got me thinking, being sick is one of the loneliest times when your a single person, living by yourself. I mean, when your a kid you have your parents and/or siblings around to take care of you, when your in a relationship you have your significant other to do those things. When your single, there is no-one to take care of you. No-one to whine to, no-one to bring you some tea, no-one to run to the store to buy you rice crispy treats because that is all you really want (so you end up going yourself, probably infecting half of the grocery store, and realize they are out of rice crispy treats, so you get so pissed off that you forget to buy dog food while you are there and don't realize it until you get home, which means that unless you want you hungry dog following you around the house barking at you because it is dinner time, you have to take your tired sick ass BACK to the store). (How's that for a run-on sentence?).
Ok, well truthfully that's all I really wanted to say and I don't really have the brain-power to think of anything more exciting to say right now.
But don't forget...it's my 1 year blogiversary on March 7th. Feel free to ask me any question you want to know!
