A letter to my body

This is part of BlogHer's Letter's to My Body Initiative.
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Dear Body,

I know you've always been a little on the heavy side. I also know that it was never a problem until society's little judgemental ideals started getting implanted in my head. Or until hormones entered the scene and it seemed like the boys were only interested in the waspy thin girls. Either way, you know I love you. We have a passionate love affair that is comfortably carried out within the privacy of our home. We watch movies, we cook tasty meals and divine desserts that we enjoy without judgement, we make love, we sleep and we read to each other while cuddled up on the couch, watching the snow fall, warmed by a fire.

But I'm like a boy dating the girl that he knows his friends wouldn't approve of. I love you and feel confidant about you. Until we leave the front door, until we go to the bar for drinks or to the store to buy something nice. Then the judgemental thoughts start creeping in. I try to ignore them, but they are there. Insinuating that those skinny girls who just walked by were laughing about you. Or those guys were joking behind our backs about you. Or that the size-4 salesgirl at Lane Bryant isn't looking at your with that pitiful "I feel so sorry that you have to shop in the big-girls store, but if you just ate less, or exercised more, or..." look. I am sorry for this. How do you handle being bombarded with all of these negative comments about you? And how have you stuck by me when I haven't always held our ground against them?

I know that I blame you sometimes. I blame you that I am single, I blame you that THAT guy didn't like me. But I know it's not your fault, and I want to take this opportunity to apologize to you for placing that blame on you. I also want to apologize to you for treating you like the temple you are. You deserve to be feed the best food, given the opportunity to dance in the rain, or warm under a lover's touch, without feelings of guilt or embarrassment.

A while back, you may remember, we were out taking a walk. We were huffing and puffing our way to the top of a hill. I was cursing at you under my breath for not making that journey easier. When we got to the top of the hill, we ran into this lady who was so happy and blurted out to any person who would listen to her "Isn't it great? Isn't it great what your body can do for you? Isn't it great your body can bring you all the way up here to see this beautiful sight?" After that my mentality changed. And I hope that you have noticed it. Because it is true, you deserve all the credit in the world for carrying me to the tops of mountains, the depths of the sea, across Mexico, Australia and everywhere we've been in between! Without you, none of this would have been possible. And I thank you for that.

So I can only hope that you enjoy the time we spend together as much as I do. You are amazing and I thank you for carrying me through this thing called life.

Love,
Ginger