When was it that you first felt like an adult? Did something specific happen or did you do something that made you feel like an adult or was it just a gradual change that happened? Or has it not happened yet?
I am 25, by legal standards I am an adult. In a different time or place I would be considered middle-age. As you all know, I own (ha, originally I wrote 'I owe'...which is quite true as well) a condo and a car (well the bank does but you get the drift), I have a full-time job (some might consider it my career, I'm starting to think more and more that it is just a stopping point until I figure out what really makes me tick), I live by myself, I don't vote (by choice), I drink, I have sex (not as often as I would like), I spend too much on shoes and foo-foo coffee drinks (more often than I should). By all standards I am a bonafide adult. I make my own decisions and I enjoy and/or suffer from the consequences of those decisions. But, truthfully, most of the time I feel like I have no idea what I am doing in life and I definitely don't feel like an 'adult'.
At work, even though I know that I know what I am doing, I doubt myself all the time. When I hang out with my parents or my sister, I still feel like the little girl, the little sister, the tag-along. I don't feel like an independent 20-something career woman. I'm not married and I don't have kids, but even if I did I don't think that would change how I feel. The only time I really feel like an 'adult' is when I am hanging out with my friends, or doing stuff by myself.
Am I just suffering from the pain of having to find my place in this life? Does everybody go through a stage like this? I see my friends who have found 'the one', who are having kids and who have found a job they love and I constantly find myself wondering why it came so easy for them and why I've been left in the dust trying to sort out the pieces of my life.
So this post took more of a turn towards 'finding yourself' than 'being an adult' but either way, how did you know you were an adult? Here, I'll add another question to try and tie this mish-mash of a post together...Have you found your place in life? How did you make it there?
Monday, January 7, 2008
On Being an Adult.
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3 comments:
I think we all go through stuff like this. I am 25, married, with 2 kids and for a while..I still didn't feel like an adult for a long time. For me...i had to gain independence (not financial, but more "mental", I know this makes no sense) from my parents. That had always been a big issue. There are still moments I think..wait..I'm still just a kid..but nope thats really not true!
I totally know what you mean I am only 21 and by no means an "adult" but the majority of the people I graduated with are married and/or having children and I am constantly wondering how the hell that can be because shit we're not adults yet! (clearly I'm in denial lol)
Yeah... I'm 25, married with a baby and a great job and I still don't feel like an adult. I still don't think I am where I want to eventually be... if that makes sense. I still feel like I have a LOT of personal growth to do.. I think it's normal. I mean, we're ONLY 25!! That's like the new 18!
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