Kind of a big thing. Maybe. I think. I don't know. I am pretty sure it is though.

There has been an interesting development on the Memphis front. So I realize I don't talk about him as much as ya'll would like, but it's because I'm not entirely sure what to talk about. But I'll try. This is all new to me, and I'm not entirely sure how to handle it or if I really even need (or want) to do anything more than I am.

Memphis and I see each other 1-2 times a week. We really don't do anything except...well...each other. And talk. We talk a lot. We have dinner sometimes, we don't others. Not exactly what I would call a relationship, but on that note, it's actually the exact kind of relationship I want right now. To spend the time I want/can with someone who excites me and entices me, physically and mentally. I don't want the humdrum of every day life with someone, I don't want to wash his clothes, or deal with his bad moods. I have enough dirty laundry on my own! At least not yet. Up until very recently I wasn't even sure I wanted him to sleep over. I've always slept by myself, and on the few occasions I sleep with someone else in the same room, let alone the same bed, I don't sleep well. But a few weeks ago, he came over on a Saturday night. This is the only night that we CAN really spend together because Sunday morning is the only morning that neither of us has to work (he works Tues-Sat, I work Mon-Fri). Back on track here, he came over a few weeks ago on a Saturday night. We did what we do (each other) and we spent a few hours talking and cuddling, then, well, we did what we do again, and then we laid there in each other's arms (ahhhh, I know) and fell asleep. A little while later I woke up randomly and was sneaking out of bed to turn off some lights I had left on, assuming that maybe he would just stay the night, but when I got back in bed he woke up and said he had to go. This has honestly been the only night I was disappointed he left. I was really looking forward to him sleeping over. Not really sure why, like I said, I don't sleep all that well when someone else is in my bed, but something about taking that next step of staying the whole night was something that would have been a perfect ending to that night. But nope, he went home. Which was fine, because it meant I actually got a decent nights sleep.

Fast forward to this weekend. We haven't seen each other all that much because I've been on vacation, he's been spending his weekends out of town kayaking and his weeks staying in the town he works in (he works about 45 minutes from where we live and to save money on gas from commuting, he's been crashing at his dad's house during the weeks). Come Saturday, we hadn't talked (texted...is really mostly all we do when we are apart) since the prior Sunday. It was partially because I was busy, and partially because I was half seeing if he would touch bases with me, since it is almost always me getting in touch with him to hang out. Come Saturday night I went to the Rodeo with a friend and shortly after getting there I got a text message from him asking if I was busy...I wrote back saying I was but I might be up for a late night booty call if he was. He was...so around midnight he came over. We stayed up until about 3am, when we drifted off to sleep. Around 5 I woke up and he was still there. I snuck out of bed to close the blinds and totally expected him to roll over and say he had to go, but instead when I crawled back in bed he just wrapped his arms around me, mumbled something about getting to play with a certain part of my anatomy that he likes very much all morning and then go boating at the kayak park, then drifted off to sleep again. I honestly laid there for probably 45 minutes thinking to myself "he's not really gonna stay the night, is he? He's gonna really wake up any moment and leave...any minute...nope, not yet...maybe I should go to sleep?"I finally fell back asleep for a few hours, rolled over, woke him up for a little morning delite, then let him go play with his kayaks for the rest of the day while I went back to sleep. So there it is, he stayed the night. It's kind of a big thing. But I'm not really sure what exactly it means. And I'm not about to ask him, because I kind of like things exactly as they are.